Feels on Feels on Feels

So I’m feeling a lot today. Some of it is related to my grandmother, some isn’t.

I can’t share one of the things that’s bothering me because my name and image are attached to this blog and I want to protect the privacy of the person involved. Just know it’s weighing heavy on my mind and I’m trying to make the highest choice.

The other thing that’s bothering me is all of the bullshit people do.

Someone tried to pick a fight with me last week and when she didn’t get the reaction she wanted, she tried to get attention from me another way yesterday. When that didn’t work, she tried a third way today.

So here’s the thing about me: I DO NOT suffer fools. In. any. way. shape. or. form. I didn’t before my grandmother died and I damn sure don’t now. If I don’t fuck with you, I don’t fuck with you. That means I’m not saying “Hi” or “Bye” to you, I’m not even going to respond to you if you have something nice to say. You don’t exist in my world.

If unfortunately we work together and I have to talk to you about something work-related, please know I will be using as few words as possible.

So this person tried to make me look bad today, it didn’t work and it never will. I’m too smart for that. However, God doesn’t like ugly and this person has had more than one illness in the last month. Sometimes, karma comes at you quick.

Basically, I’m sick of people directing their insecurities, weaknesses and bullshit my way. Plus, I’m sick of most people because I’m still chock full of grief-rage.

Because of all my feels, I needed my best friend today and he dropped everything and was there for me. It’s nice to know and feel that you are loved. That’s all I want.

Wow. I just had an epiphany. I’ve been saying that all I want is to feel loved. I felt that today from my bestie. I’ve had what I’ve been wanting this. entire. time. Amazing.

So I just took a pause in writing this post to watch an Instagram live video of Serena Williams surprising a group of people from Black Girls Code at a showing of Black Panther and I feel A LOT better. They were so surprised and full of joy when they saw her! I hope I can bring that much joy to people one day.

So, go see Black Panther tomorrow if you haven’t already, I will be and CANNOT WAIT to see it and tell you all about it, and I hope you’re having a good night!

 

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